Oh, hey there guy in the the throes of a mid-life crisis. Say, that silver Benz with the scissor doors you're driving is a real screamer. It's sick, yo! Did you just wax it? Because it's shinier than your rhinestoned Ed Hardy t-shirt. Dig your spray-on tan too, bro.
With a car like that it's obvious you're well-endowed with an enormous…bank account and sense of self-pride. You've earned it, working hard to sell people subprime loans over the last few years. Reward yourself. In fact, reward yourself with both of those parking spots. Straddle that line. A Mercedes like that needs some breathing room. You don't want some beater-driving peasant parking too close and dinging up that paint job, now do you?
Every time I'm in a parking lot and I see some clown with bleached teeth and frosted tips take up two spaces with his status symbol, the above internal monologue courses through me like battery acid. And I'm willing to bet I'm not the only one.
In fact, I'm not. God bless the folks at Moscow-based online newspaper, The Village. They've created a new Android app, eloquently named "Parking Douche." Their modus operandi? Simple: stop the parking jerks by publicly shaming them in the online news and on social media.
When users see someone who has taken up two spaces or parked on a sidewalk, all they have to do is snap a picture with their phone and upload the image to the Parking Douche database.
“The data is streamed live to banner ads that are targeted through an IP address, so people that live or work close to locations where these cars were parked see it.”
Unfortunately, these banners pop up on websites and "interrupt you while you're trying to read an online article." To get rid of the pop-up ads, users must relay info about the offender on social media. This may be a cool app, but you're not going to win me over with annoying pop-up ads. Still, its creators do seem aware of this by taking measures so users aren't overwhelmed with pop-ups.
However, I don't think being humiliated on social media is enough to make offenders change their ways. I mean, their tolerance for humiliation is obviously quite high. That's why I'm fond of tweezing a dirty diaper out of a near-by trash can and dropping it on their windshield.
credit: The Village