The only thing more enjoyable than a nice cold beer is enjoying one that someone else got for you. C’mon, you know I am right. The couch is just too darn comfy.
That said, saying the words “fetch me a beer” rarely ends well. You are more likely to end up in the doghouse than with an actual beer. And we don’t want that. Well, don’t worry…this awesome tutorial provided by WikiHow takes care of that. These simple instructions will help you train your dog to fetch you a cold one so you can spend more time at your PlayStation.
If you don’t have a dog, well, that is step one. Get a doggy! You can find quite a few beer-fetching ones over at PetFinder.
1. Tie a rope or a tug toy to the door of your fridge. You can also wrap a treat inside the towel to make it more enticing. This is how my other half usually gets me to do chores.
2. With your dog next to you, say “Get me a beer” or whatever command you have chosen for this action.
3. Say “Get me a beer” and encourage your dog to pull on the towel. Give praise and a treat every time your dog pulls the fridge open.
If your dog happens to be the size of Marmaduke, this is going to end badly. Like, “fridge landing on top of you” badly. I suggest borrowing a neighbors dog.
4. Put the beer can on the lowest shelf of the fridge so that your dog can reach it. It helps to clear out any stuff around it. If necessary, wrap something around the can so the dog can grab it more easily. And put something against the fridge door so that it stays open without you having to hold it.
5. Give the “drop” command so that she drops the can into your hand. Give praise and a treat. Repeat until your dog can pick up a beer can and put it on your hand using only verbal commands.
6. Move further away from the fridge. Rinse and repeat.
7. Open the fridge door slightly.
8. Dangle a treat so that your dog gets up on his hind legs and leans with his front paws against the door.
9. Move further away, leaving the fridge open. Tell your dog to “Close it”. Reward your dog whenever he closes the fridge.
10. Stand close to the fridge. Ask your dog to “Get me a beer”. He should now be comfortable opening the fridge door. While the fridge door is open, tell the dog to “fetch”.
11. Have him put the beer in your hand and reward him. Repeat but this time say “Close it” after he grabs the can and reward him profusely after he’s brought you the beer.
12. Move a little further away and say “Get me a beer”. Your dog should open the fridge door but if he forgets to, just grab the beer or close the fridge, and remind him verbally.
13. Reward him when he brings you the beer (having done everything he was expected to do). Keep doing this and eventually most dogs will complete all of the tasks with a single command: “Get me a beer”.